Friday, May 15, 2009

A Variance Haiku

Ah, the Slop he thought
"Ship me half a huge split pot?"
But Cake, it did not...
It's a comin'

Amylouwho, may all you flops be as tasty as

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Donktastic finish to $5 donkament

I did play better than this for the 1st 5 hours, really I did

I'm a comin' :)

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Sloppy Poker 2009 Part 2 Update (aka Escape from Stars Hell)

My less exciting, lounge and diamond-card-free update follows...

Summary for the rushed and/or not-so-interested
Post-PokerStars Elite grindy life is better. You know, with less painful angst and non-stop losing and stuff. Non-Stars hourly win rate actually not too far off my 2008 rate -> glimmers of hope for no jobamant (please oh please let the Saving Heater find me)

Oh, YTD mileage = 350
Hey! Mr Math just gave me some great news related to my mileage tally folks! If someone gave me just $2 into my PokerStars account for every mile I've logged, I'd be up nearly 7 bucks there for the year! Wow, not too shabby. And some of you thought 20-tabling against regulars might not be a good idea. Ha!

lol donkaments

Just bounced out 5th in Cake $33 rebuy for $1,500 as of 2:45am Wed. I think I agree with Mark's comments after he busto'd 6th for $1,600 - 1st and $1,000s more might have been a smidge more satisfying. Yeah, I'd say self-destructing this late after chugging 4 cups of uber-strong coffee then some tea on top to stay sharp is less than optimal.

Here's a link to my stupid? unlucky? brain-dead / cursed? gambool from SB. (Backdrop: I was tied for shortstack with 12% of chips in play, and BB had raised ~50-75% of hands pre-flop since we got to 6-or-7-handed including shoving on me from BB once or twice. FWIW my image was likely pretty weak-tight-nitty from a combo of being card dead at FT & working up payday ladder without seeing too many floppos.)


To be fair, even though I'm sad / hating myself for the bust-out hand, any cash I got above $167 was pure LuckBox-flavored gravy since I got ~98% of my stack in oh-so-bad with QQ vs Villain's KK but (Imacomin!) hit 2-outer on flop to survive and dodge finishing ~30th . Also moving up to 4th was worth $500, I was trying to keep my eye on the $5k pop for 1st more than 1 more notch up. Like Vanessa Rousso says, I made the Agressive Call here.

Over/under on how long after I wake up & how many times I see visions of that sweet hand replaying in my brain tomorrow? How's 3 1/2 seconds and 27. (Pssst, parlay the under then the over for the W.)

Also, nice job by me failing to bet on the Celtics 2 games in a row to avoid winning $s from dramatic 4th quarter comebacks. nh,wp,tlaHRm (nicehand, wellplayed, thatslameassHomerRollmanagement)

PokerStars - FPP->$s

For May, 3 FPP -> cash items in VIP store at max value. 500 FPPs->$8, 1k FPPs -> $16, 16k->$160. Nice ways to continue to empty the Stars FPP vault and reduce the pain.

I look at my Jan-March log and feel sad, confused & more than a little brain dead when I ponder the 952 hours played averaging 18 tables there as a not-quite-break even-after-rakeback-added "pro". Good times.

FullTilt - Ah sweet, sweet cash

Western Union added as a Withdrawal option. Trip report: 2 cash outs for $200 each, 36-72 hour turnaround, Amy picked up cash no problemo at a RiteAid spot 2 miles from our house. (The only problem is the stress of worrying I might forget to declare cash withdrawals next April. I'm losing sleep nights.)

PLO Games are so-so mostly with some bright spots, but better than Stars I think.

I dipped my toe into Fullring NL some more there. Kind of sort of a little bit fun I guess, probably because I ran better than I played. I did uptick a couple of buyins but obviously more important: ship the FullTilt Academy points tally upticks (FTPA points, now with new Warm Tingly sensation of Achievement flavored with pennies of value!)

Cake - good karma in my 2nd go-round there

Randomly noticed quite a few overlays for guaranteed prize pool donkaments (e.g., $30 rebuy $25k guarantee had ~700 buyins)

What's cooler than cash flipaments? Cake Kamikaze donkaments - everyone forced all in every hand, most fun way to spend 60 seconds online I can think of. I have a pro-like ROI in them so far - "Out of 143 players in Tournament 5196544 ($3 - Kamikaze Tournament!), you came in 8th and have won $15.44"

PLO, PLO/8 NLO/8 games are a bit sparse, but occasionally nice & juicy. My playing style has ranged by the hour (& beat) from NITtyMcNit to LAGSpewTard, but I've run up my $110 rakeback payment I used to seed the account up to ~$450 in May while generating $160 more in rakeback due June 1st.

Emailed Cake I had server problem after raising to $6 preflop (brace yourself, I was playing $3-$6 minbet O/8), called $3 dark postflop because a Cake server message blocked the flop on me, then got booted from table on turn.
Obviously I expected FullTilt style response plan 1) After a random amount of time, receive "we got your email" stock reply 2) 2-3 days of radio silence 3) Copy & paste email saying something relevant like "Your Iron Man points were correctly credited for play in June 2007. Please visit for details, or refer a friend and receive $50!" Got a response from Cake in 30 minutes saying "we didn't detect any server problems, but we credited you $18 for the inconvenience."

Bodog - Overlays, occasional juicy juicy

Noticed some overlays in Guaranteed prize pools here too.

PLO games sometimes uber-TAG (30% <20bb class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_33">oooooooooh PartyPoker pre-UIGEA PLO / PLO8 games with 50-60% flops and 50-100BB avg pots. If dubhead or blaz1992 is
playing, have a seat. Seriously.

Rakeback available, and you can use Bodog Poker Points to play in SNGs to get T$s.

Absolute - wha?

I know what you're thinking.... "Cereously? Absolute?" Cereus network puns are fun.
Anyway, I fired $70 in rakeback payment to re-seed account. Pretty sure most of the 2+2 / multi-tabling TAG-pro crowd is gone from there, so I may just see how games are.

In all Cereusness, I know the track record there and UB is uber-shady. but I think for any online site, being concerned / paranoid that
1) we might be cheated
2) we might or have our accounts hacked
3) the Kewanakeekookoo gaming commission is useless / corrupt
4) they might never pay us
is just part of an EV calculation.
If a site is populated with cheaters and/or bots but I'm winning, then meh.

Reward for the dedicated, unemployed or bored at work who made it this far

NSFW but if you've seen Silence of the Lambs, you'll either laugh hard or think I'm a sick puppy for finding this funny. Worth clicking, really.